


Written in the Stars

by LegolasLovely



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Constellations, Cuddling & Snuggling, During The Hobbit, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, Night Terrors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-26
Updated: 2020-01-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:01:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22410676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LegolasLovely/pseuds/LegolasLovely
Summary: Kili’s night terrors lead to him learning some lessons about himself.
Relationships: Kíli (Tolkien)/Reader, Kíli (Tolkien)/You
Comments: 8
Kudos: 79





	Written in the Stars

Night was supposed to be silent. It was the time when all creatures surrendered to the deep, dark will of sleep. All was meant to be still until the sun rose. On watch, however, one quickly learned that the night is no more silent than the day, especially with snoring dwarfs right under one’s nose.

(Y/N) leaned her head against the bark of the tree behind her and tried to listen past the grumbling snores, whistling noses, rustling wind, and the bubbling of the river to the north. She tried to listen for an oncoming threat, but how she was supposed to do that was beyond her. An entire orc pack could fall from the trees and she wouldn’t notice until a knife was held to her own throat. She glared at the sleeping Fili, wincing as his inhale made a noise like an oliphaunt’s screech. “And it would be your fault,” she said for no one in particular to hear.

A _noiseless_ sigh fell from her own lips. Only the stars gave off light tonight and she looked up, trying to find the constellations she had recently learned from the dwarfs. She tilted her head and squinted, ignoring the scratching of the wind as it blew bits of her hair around her forehead. A cluster of stars started to form a recognizable shape, but she couldn’t remember the name. Balin would be disappointed in her.

Then she stood, dagger drawn, alarmed at the sound of heavy breathing. It was a panicked sound- breath in, a crying whimper, then a loud gust out as if someone was in pain. In the moment it took for her to stand, ten scenarios flashed through her mind. Was someone hurt? Had the enemy gotten into the company while she was distracted by her star gazing? How foolish could she get? Should she wake the company, or was it just a dying animal further in the wood? She would go explore it. No. It was a trap.

When her heart stopped its thrashing, she realized the sound was only Kili. She’d heard a little about his recent dreams, but hadn’t seen the effect of their wrath. He seemed locked in sleep and she was momentarily frozen in concern. But another grunt escaped him and she tucked her dagger away and leaned down to him, pulling his white fingers out of their fists and whispering to him.

“Kili, wake up.”

Terror etched its lines into his smooth, joyful features. His whines grew louder, clutching at the conscious, drumming heart. (Y/N) rubbed his arm hard, ripping him away from the dark danger in his dream. Brown eyes flew open wide and only the tight grip on his shoulders kept him from bolting through the wood.

“Ki, it’s all right. You were dreaming. It was just a dream.”

He shook his head wildly, sending his damp hair clinging to his face. “No, no-Fili-”

(Y/N) turned and pointed. “Fili’s right there. Everyone’s fine. Do you want me to wake him?” she asked.

Kili sat up and craned his neck, as if he didn’t believe her. He watched carefully as his brother’s chest filled and the oliphaunt screech proudly sounded. Tears had gathered in his eyes, almost filling them to the brim, and it was a wonder how Kili could actually see his brother at all.

“No,” he said. “Don’t. Don’t wake him.” 

(Y/N) nodded, slowly bringing her hand away from him. “All right. A-are you okay?”

“Of course.” He sounded sure but he looked anything but.

She sat back on her haunches before rising to her feet. “Well, I’ll see you in the morning then.” A hand stopped her from stepping away.

“Will you just- can you just stay with me for a bit?” He impatiently wiped the leftover tears from his lashes and couldn’t quite look her in the eye.

How could she deny him in this state? But she had a duty to fulfill. She set her hand over his before it slipped away. “I’m still on watch but I’ll be right over there,” she said, pointing back to the tree at the watch point.

He scrunched his nose and shook his head. “No. It’s fine. I’ll be fine.”

“(Y/N).”

She whirled, startled by Dwalin’s voice. 

Dwalin’s arms crossed over his chest as he crossed to the tree. “Get some rest,” he said. “I’ll take over watch.” His quirked brow stopped any arguments from her as he tossed her bedroll to the ground next to her.

She sat with a thump, surprised at her release but also relieved since she had felt sleep pulling at her for the past few hours. Not that she could rush to her roll with Kili staring at her expectantly. She’d never seen him this vulnerable and she wished she’d roused Fili when she had the chance. “Do you want to talk about it? The dream-”

“No.”

“Okay.” She rolled out the small blanket next to his, wracking her mind for something comforting to say. When she had a nightmare that so obviously bothered her, she’d get it out of her mind by telling the story to someone else and then she’d have no trouble falling back asleep. Kili wasn’t going to be so easy. “Um-”

“Will you just… stay?”

She exhaled, most of her worry seeping out of her. “Of course.” Her bedroll was adjusted until it was practically attached to Kili’s and she laid on her side, facing him, feeling her heart break as she noticed how the fear had remained in his face. Her thumb moved independently to smooth the crease between his brows. “I’m sorry you’re going through this. Especially now. These dreams can’t make this quest any easier for you.”

He shrugged, his vest scraping against the bedroll in the reticent darkness. “Usually I’m able to ignore them but that one…” His jaw clenched hard, the moving bone visible under his skin.

(Y/N) hummed and tucked herself away from the wind. “It wasn’t real, Kili.”

“I know.” She shifted until he met her gaze. He gave a small smile. “Still pretty alarming though,” he said, adjusting his pack under his head. “You look exhausted. Get some rest.”

She couldn’t help but close her eyes. “You too. Thorin said we’re moving at first light.” She felt his arm slide under her head. The movement startled her awake again. 

“Shh. Go to sleep,” he said.

Kili watched her drift off, listening for any sign that she was uncomfortable with his touch as his arms closed in around her. He was selfish. He needed someone close, someone to protect. She fit so perfectly in his arms and he gave in to the urge to drag her even closer to his chest and fit his chin on the top of her head. A little noise escaped her as she nosed his vest and she reminded him of the small bunnies he and his brother raised when they were dwarflings. Soft and quiet, not breakable, but strong in her own right. She wriggled, tucking an arm up and around his waist. The nightmare started to slip from his mind. He matched her breathing, deep and slow, and concentrated on her scent with every inhale and it didn’t take long for him to follow her into sleep.

***

Morning came much too quickly. Tender fingers on her arm woke (Y/N) from her deep sleep with a start. Kili was crouching over her, his dark hair blending into the barely lit forest around them. 

“Morning. We’ll be off soon.” He straightened and disappeared, leaving only her share of the dried meats in his wake. That was the last she’d heard from him all day. And he was equally quiet through the next.

Hours of silent marching gave one time to think. And overthink. (Y/N) followed the company up and down hills, through fields, and over rocks and mountains and boulders with a blind faith. Most times she simply watched her feet as the ground underneath morphed from grass to dirt to stone, all the while thinking of what she’d done to make Kili avoid her. She must have done something in her sleep that night. But what could be horrid enough to make him so shy of her?

She glanced at him and found him already looking at her. A small smile spread over his lips before his eyes darted away.

“We’ll stop here for the night,” Thorin announced. (Y/N) barely heard him and she bumped straight into Fili’s back before her. 

“You okay?” he asked over his shoulder.

“Of course. Sorry,” she said, dropping her pack and rotating her sore shoulder. She didn’t miss how Kili set up his bedroll across the clearing from hers. A sigh escaped her, but she continued with her duties to help set up the camp for the night and dish out the rations for the nightly meal. 

The company quickly unwound and (Y/N) toed over to Fili who was left alone while he sharpened his daggers. She plopped down next to him, eyeing his brother on the other end of the camp as he carved more arrows from the twigs he’d found. 

“Is everything okay? With Kili? He’s been… quiet,” she said, feeling her heart drop to her stomach. “I know the night terrors have returned.”

Fili glanced up, first to her, then to his brother before he resumed his work. “He’s all right. It’s not the terrors. He-he’s working through something.”

She nodded. “Oh. As long as he’s okay. I just, I wanted to know.”

“You’re a good friend to him (Y/N),” Fili said, holding out her own dagger to her. “I sharpened this for you. It was getting pretty dull.”

She breathed out a laugh and returned the dagger to her belt. “Sneaky one, you are. Is it sharp enough to cut through orc hide now?”

He hummed, and chuckled at her quirked brow. 

“Kili’s got a good brother,” she said, elbowing Fili before leaning back on her hands to study the stars that were just starting to peek out into the darkening sky. One constellation clearly shone above. “What is that one again?” she asked, leaning to Fili’s shoulder and pointing up. “See it? Right there. Centaurus is below.” She moved her pointing finger in a square motion and then flicked away the tail. 

“Lupus,” an unexpected voice said.

She whirled her head so fast, Kili’s form shook in her gaze. “The wolf,” she said to him above.

“Yes.” He glanced to his brother before holding his hand out to her. “Will you come with me? I want to speak with you.”

She took his hand and her breath caught as he effortlessly pulled to her stand. 

“I won’t take you far,” he said. He never released her hand as he led her away from the company. “For years, I couldn’t find Centaurus on my own. Our father would often show us but only Fili could spot it without help.” He stood still, finally looking down from the stars and to (Y/N)’s face. “He’d like you. Our father.”

“I would have liked to have met him. From what I’ve heard, he was very special.”

Kili hummed, watching her eyes sparkle like the stars themselves. “I’m sorry if you’ve felt I’ve been avoiding you recently.”

“Haven’t you been?”

“Yes.” The wind had returned, breathing through his hair. He moved a finger to loop the locks behind his ear, but it was useless and they continued to tickle his face. He turned into the wind. “It was unfair of me to put so much space between us without telling you why. Without telling you the truth of the matter. If it’s this windy in Erebor, I’m turning right back around and returning to Ered Luin.”

She took his shoulders and moved him, placing herself in the gust of wind so her hair blew wildly around her face and his swam neatly off his shoulders. “Will you just tell me what this is about?” She tried not to roll her eyes and failed miserably. Luckily, it made him chuckle, but his smile soon vanished.

“I didn’t want to tell you of my dream because it wasn’t only about Fili. It was also about you. It made me realize how much I care for you.”

Her brows flew upwards. “And so, you avoided me because caring about me is more terrible than any fate in your nightmares?” She turned from him but he grabbed her.

“No! (Y/N), you’re not understanding.”

“I get it.” She scooted around him and darted back to the company, but again, he caught her shoulders. 

“No, you don’t. Let me explain.” He swept her hair from her cheeks and cradled her face in his hands. “Falling in love is terrifying enough without having it threatened by orcs and wargs every day. I didn’t think I could afford to be distracted by these feelings while we’re in such danger, but this isn’t something I can just ignore. I tried. I can’t… you are always in my thoughts. It’s maddening.”

Her gaze flitted around the features of his face. “It’s not the best timing, is it?”

“No,” he chuckled, dropping his hands. 

“However,” she said, the corner of her lips dancing at his renewed expression of hope, “we can’t ignore what we feel.”

“We?”

“We.”

He could not make himself dull her smile. So he kissed her cheeks, her nose, her eyes, her forehead and her hair until she took his chin and brought his lips to hers. He still felt the tight pull of her bottom lip as she chuckled against him.

“Will you help me with something?” she asked, arms still tucked around his waist as they were the night of his dream. 

“Anything.”

“Help me find Sagittarius?”

“Ah, the Archer.”

She hummed and let him maneuver her until she was standing in front of him. His arms crossed over her shoulders and he kissed her hair as he began to explain. “The bow may be the easiest part to find. See it there?” He took her hand, kissing every one of her fingers before pointing it towards the sky. 

“Yes, I see.”


End file.
